Welcome Back!

Ladies and Gents,

Welcome back to 9 & 3/4. After much deliberation, tribulation, and downright exhilaration, I am excited to announce the return of 9 & 3/4, as well as the cancellation of The Blinking Red Light. While promising, I realized that The Blinking Red Light was simply me running away from my true calling: Harry Potter.

I am back and very excited to be living in New York City. Stay tuned for some special posts! New people, new characters -- it will be a blend of a lot of things.

Train Stops Here

To the devoted followers of 9 & 3/4:

I regret to inform you that this, my 47th post, will be the last before 9 & 3/4 is laid to rest. But do not fear! Do not fret! 34 posts longer than Summer in Portland, 9 & 3/4 has been, for me, a great joy. I have enjoyed blogging the long and crazy nights of my last year as an undergraduate. I will continue to look back and re-read 9 & 3/4 to remind myself--literally--of nights spent traversing the city.

Check back in the coming days to find a link to 9 & 3/4's successor, The Blinking Red Light.

Cheers.

If It's Murder, You Know She Wrote It

Thursday. 40z on 40. Forty days until graduation (37 now). Most beautiful day of the semester by far, 80 degrees, sunny, slight breeze. Doesn't get much better. Wake up around noon, hit the steps with my double egg/cheese/bacon on a roll from HamDel, ready to enjoy my day, ready to bone, 55th exit, damn, damn, already we home. Get some color, talk to people on the steps, go for a run. TyRone is in town for an interview (he got the job!), up from DC, and I'm super stoked for his arrival. 5pm, I drink a 40 of Bud heavy on the grass with Horchata and her little sister, young Babrams, who is in town from LA for the week, before Cherry Island's show in Dodge, which was da bomb. Drunk by 8 --> perfect for TyRone's arrival. He will stay with me for two nights....

Glass Table; Reno; Happy Hour; Catcher in the Rye

Last Sunday I bought an approximately 30"x30" glass table from this girl living next door in 514, who was moving out the next day. She was a GS student, born and raised in Reno, Nevada, who was moving back to LA, where she had lived before coming to Columbia. She was quirky, in a sense, but had an inexplicable attractive quality to her, so I didn't mind waiting for a few minutes while she talked and wiped down the table for me. I bought it from her for $15. Rufus helped me carry it home. The reason I mention the acquisition of the glass table is that, for several days, it sat leaned up against my window because it was too big to put anywhere. When Cherry Island came over on Wednesday to take a look at it, we decided to do a little re-arranging. An hour later my room was completely transformed -- except for the bed and closet. It is a refreshing new look. But it also makes me sad to think that I will only enjoy my new set-up for another six weeks, until graduation. Ron Weasley sits atop the glass table, next to some newspapers, books, and magazines. I also keep my wallet there now, a nice place to throw shit when I come home from a long night. Ha! Bet you thought I was going to say day. If you're able to secure the big gray comfy chair which sits between the closet and the table, you will find yourself in a fortunate position; at just the right angle you can combine perfectly the activities of watching the television and keeping close observation on the other people in the room (if there are any), all the while glancing over an issue of Time Out New York to learn about where you can go to drink cheaply on a Monday from noon to eight in the evening. I have my Religion & Politics seminar tomorrow morning at 11, but I think I may just stay up all night and read Catcher in the Rye. Fuck it, I'm a senior.

Spring Break: New York City Edition

Drop. Drop. Drop. Rain. Wind. Rain. Rain. Wind. Home. Sunday. Through. Tuesday. Beginning. Beautiful. Weather. 4:59. Mile. Still. Fucking. Got. It. Superhuman. Sixty. To. Seventy. Degrees. Sunny. Dorrian's. Karaoke. Drank. Lots. Sang. Lots. Bruce. With. Gonzo. Sweats. Maple. Rufus. Horchata. Wholly. Foods. Tomb. Raider. P. Bear. Mazda. Blue. 3. Wednesday. St. Paddy's. Day. A. Behanding. In. Spokane. Christopher. Walken. Play. Absolutely. Amazing. Applause. Applause. Whole. Foods. Beer. Good. Beer. Lots. Of. It. 9. &. 3/4. young. BUC. Growlers. Saint. Tony's. Cornbeef. 14. Pounds. Blends. Guinness. Silk. Cuts. Cherry. Island. Heights. Rufus. Irish. Car. Bombs. Away! Old. Horse. Back. To. The. Stable. Very. Thirsty. New. Blends. Pop. Pop. Pop. I. Don't. Like. To. Pop. Thursday. Wake. Up. Disarray. Run. Hot. Unpleasant. Tomb. Raider's. Birthday. Downtown. LES. Kinski. Rivington. Norfolk. #128. Yum. Next. Cherry. Tavern. PBR. Shots. Next. Home. Drop. Horchata. Off. Cherry. Island. Chewbucka. Meet. Blends. UES. Pop! Next. Raines. Law. Room. Negroni. Negroni. Conversation. Good. Conversation. Ron. Weasley. 123. &. Hampsterdam. Bed. 5am. Friday. Wake. Up. 11am. Street. Cleaning. Sleep. Car. Few. Minutes. Gonzo's. Birthday! Bday. Brunch. Good. Enough. To. Eat. Absolut. Citron. Arnold. Palmer's. Drunk. By. 1pm. Pick. Up. Keg. Bud. Light. Basketball. Blends. Afternoon. Next. Billiards. Hall. Shake. Shack. Starved. Party. Begins. Around. 9. Pong. Another. Keg. OMAGA. Why. Did. I. Drink. So. Much? Haha. Just. Kidding. But. Seriously. First. Keg. Stand. In. Two. Years. Sixteen. Seconds. Full. Pump. Beat. BQ. Superhuman status. Don't. Throwup. Refuse. To. Throwup. Throw. Some. 999. In. There. For. Good. Measure. Great. Party. Saturday. Return. Car. To. Mama. Bear. Highline. Relax. Rufus. Horchata. Chelsea. Market. Vince. New. Sweatshirt. Softest. Thing. Ever. Most. Beautiful. Day. Ever. Scratch. Best. Week. Scratch. Best. Spring. Break. Senior. Year. New. York. City. WHAA.

How Do You Make It In America?

"Man, I think the main thing people tend to forget is, in order to stay focused on your mission, you gotta block out all the bullshit. I mean, it's, like, really easy to achieve a dream if you just stay focused and sacrifice a little bit, and remain determined. And you know, the bigger the dream, the harder you might have to grind for it. But everything takes time, you know, you just gotta have extreme patience. That's all."

Surreality

 

Let me start by saying that I truly did want to take it easy this weekend. I had every intention of doing so. Early Thursday evening Nelson picked me up after my midterm, which was unpleasant to say the least, and  we made the hellish drive up to Fordham University (that's East Bronx for those not up on their five boroughs), where we had dinner with our friend KoKo. Rumblings of a Saint Tony's "Surrealism" party had, indeed, reached my ears earlier in the day, which begged the question: to go or to GO? Which do you think I chose? S-S-surreal weekend begin in five...four...three...two...one...

Look! It's a Magic Mercedes Bus!

11pm on a Wednesday night - do you know where your magic Mercedes bus is? The night finally introduced my friends to the magic Mercedes van, owned and driven by the cool & collected Sebastien. Have a couple of drinks @ 999 with Cherry Island J. Willy before flying down Columbus in the van (blasting HOT 97) to pick up Wholly Foods and Lara Croft Tomb Raider. First stop: SubMercer. Martinis that weren't really Martinis, Stella Artois, drinking games, blends, mussIC. We chill there until 2am or so, before heading to Le Poisson Rouge? strange stop, indeed, we only stay for twenty minutes before going to Employees Only (510 Hudson St.) for a night cap, Maker's on a bunch of rocks. It's 345 in the morning and we are all very drunk and tired; we hop in the magic bus! and magically, it takes us home. In bed with Ron Weasley by 430. YOU HAVE TO LOVE WEDNESDAYS.

Mean to Me

Ah, the perks of my new job. Last night I go to "work" on the second floor of the Bowery Hotel for the private event screening & debut of Mean to Me, British supermodel Agyness Deyn's first film directed by multi-media artist Peter McGough, and co-starring Law & Order's Linus Roache. A Manhattan-set 1930s noir art short about a courtesan (Deyn) and her newly fortuneless lover (Roache) as they come face to face with the stark, unanticipated reality of the Great Depression. In 1930s tradition, Edward III, Guerlain Shalimar perfume, and Mikimoto sponsored a lavish party (Deyn was there!), and I got a Guerlain gift bag as payment, which included perfume, the March issue of Elle magazine, eye cream? and a Mikimoto book about pearls (I gave it all to my mom this morning at breakfast, but kept the Pall Malls and Lucky Strikes I also got).

"Sail Away, Motherfuckers"

Charity event last night at 385 Broadway loft, sponsored by Guinness and Edward III Absinthe. "Bartended" Absinthe from 7-10 while Mark and Ed did their thing; it's not difficult, but it is a process to make each drink, which sometimes makes people unhappy. But! alas, people love me, so it wasn't a big deal. I had fun, I had a couple of drinks, everyone almost everyone was super cool, and I made, like, $30 in tips. Met two Columbia grads ('07, '09) who are now working for the U.S. Attorney in New York. Little did I know that my night was just beginning...

"There Are Some Ugly American Features"

Thursday. St. Tony's. Valentine's. Day. Semi. Formal. Date. Wholly Foods. Pre. Game. Horchata's. And. Cherry Island's. Blends. Wild. Turkey. Jack. Daniels. Friends. Drunk. Black. Bow Tie. Black. Suit. Dancing. More dancing. 4am. Bed. Wake up. Friday. First. Day. Of. Work. Edward. the. Third. Absinthe. Downtown. DBGB. Hotel. Delmano. Hunter's. Apartment. Prospect Heights. Washington. Commons. Speakeasy. Beer. Blue. Point. Park Slope. Random. Moroccan. Restaurant. Two. Swedish. Girls. Black. Finance. Guy. Wine. Moroccan. Lager. Skirt. Steak. Union. Hall. Whiskey. Soda. Early. Bed. Home. Midnight. Catch. Up. Old. Friend. Saturday. Try. To. Work. In. Butler. Can't. Eyes. Tired. Shutting. Night. Fashion. Show. With. Cocks.  Anne. Police. Song. Mike. Vensel. Models. Absinthe. Photographs. Runway. Stylish. Black. East. Village. Dinner. Desnuda. 7th. A. South. American. Wine. Bar. Ceviche. Sweet. Potatoes. Drunk. Bottle. Wine. Rufus. Horchata. Death. &. Co. Gin. No. Flash. Please. Pomme. Frittes. Four. Sauces. Cab. Driver. Who. Is. On. Crack. Cocaine. Funny. Drive. Home. We. Are. Wasted. What. A. Weekend. Sunday. Night. Valentine's. Day. Dinner. At. Wholly. Foods. Apt. Delicious. Clueless. She's All That. Star Trek. Lots. Of. Movies. Bulleit. Bourbon. Wine. Pudding. Yum. 1020. Sweats. Rufus. Drunk. Again. Bed. End. Of. Weekend. Eyes. Hands. Too. Tired. Why. I. Wrote. Like. This.

999

 

Wake up late Saturday morning. Trudge to the library and attempt to read a few articles. I manage to get through two. I promised myself tonight would be low-key, haha! Good one. Another broken promise.EoH, Robin Hood, and Elle come over around 5pm to hang out. We "hang" for thirty minutes, then we out. Elle has to study, but the three musketeers are on their way to Crack Deli for Spicy Specials; we eat them in a cab on our way to the Guggenheim Met...

Party & Bullshit

"In my room at home I secretly practiced the Charleston, in case I was ever in a situation where I'd be asked to do it. I'd caught on that among the more glamorous crowd at Barnard and Columbia, it was very much the thing to emulate the customs of the Roaring Twenties. In addition to the revival of the Charleston, this involved a lot of flamboyant drinking and the throwing of wild and lavish parties. The previous spring, thirty students had sold pints of blood to finance a May Wine Festival at the swanky Essex House -- on whose neon sign that night the E and the first s had been totally blacked out, according to later legend. Blood and wine -- there was something about the decadent absurdity of that party that captured my imagination. Never had I imagined that pleasure could be pursued with such seriousness." - Joyce Johnson, Minor Characters

Sex Ed Fail

Resolved Question: Can your baby get pregnant if you have sex while pregnant? like if you are pregnant with a baby girl, and you have sex while you are pregnant, can the sperm go up in there and impregnate the baby?

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters: The baby CAN get pregnant only if it's a female. If you suspect that your baby is pregnant, try not to have sex again. You run the risk of getting your baby's baby pregnant, and that can lead to complications like an infinite loop.

classic.

Dear Fucking Nails, I Hate You

Not those nails, the other ones. I just spent twenty minutes trying to nail with a hammer my beloved Dazed and Confused poster, which, last semester, used to hang in the suite, but this semester has somehow found a new living situation among a pile of clothes behind by door. I really really tried, but fuck you nails! you are impossible, you are weak - you cannot withstand the blow of my hammer. Hammer: 1. Nails: 0.

Still kind of sick, whatever. "When nothing else works, blog" - words to live by.. A great mentor of mine once uttered those beautiful, mottofic words before he was run over by an eighteen-wheeler. Hah, just kidding! I'd rather not to do my stat homework; instead, I'll write about absofuckinglutely nothing. THEY really shouldn't let average citizens like myself have access to blog for free. I should be charged money to write this crap, on da realz, yo. On a lighter note, Happy Groundhog Day! One of my favorite movies of ALL-TIME. Melvin and Rufus just left for Dead Poet to enjoy some beers, but I have work to do/early class/still not feeling well. Still rare of me not to join them. I yearn for an alcoholic beverage (I also yearn to go back to Dutch Kills - who doesn't like it when bartenders tell you what the fuck is up?). Busy day planned for tomorrow + I hope to make it out at nighttime. 

Wow, my life is boring! I should get a job or something, for next year.

"Feet on the ground, head in the sky." <-- Barely.

Happy Monday, Happy February

Err, today? I hate being sick, which I am, kinda. When I constantly have snot and boogers and ickiess oozzing from my nostrils, I become severely self-conscious and fall into a quasi-category of mental hibernation. I shut off from the world. This morning Melvin (welcome back to the blog, Mel!) and I attended our 11am Political Science seminar, the first class we've had together in four years --> crazy. It's an interesting class, but the last one I'm going to today. I need to rest up and not be sick anymore + I needed to run some errands this afternoon. Followed class up with lunch at Nussbaum, then Melvin jetted downtown to his place of work, while I headed home to 9 & 3/4 to my bed. The rest of my night will consist of more bed, and reading/writing/TV/soup. I just now learned of a mysterious new Columbia blog, The Red Zone, written by a senior at Barnard or Columbia, who works in Avery - I'm pretty sure I know her, but there's an equally good chance I don't. One can only wish. I hope she continues to write as I will be looking for updates. She is a witty writer, and the words she produces are far more coherent and interesting than the ones you are reading here.
Less than four months till graduation: not yet sure how I feel. I no longer desire to work - in fact I despise the thought of it - however, once the bubble bursts, I fear the party may be over. I bought a ticket to see Hot Chip today, on April 23, @ Terminal 5. Saw them there two years ago and it was a wild show. Hopefully Murakunas will buy a ticket, too, so that we can replicate the legendary sophomore year shitshow. Anyway, I hope I get better soon so that I can blog about something far more interesting later in the week, more interesting than a monDAY.

Don't Push Me Cause I'm Close to the Edge

 

 Wake up at 3pm yesterday.Previous night is P-Bear's 23rd, which we celebrate at Brother Jimmy's on the UES. Party all night, bed at 7. So I wake up at 3pm yesterday afternoon and make myself some eggs (scrambled) and bacon; it seems like all I am eating these days are bacon and eggs, with some dat cheese, too.

"Do not what I would do unless I tell you to"

 I know people are reading 9 & 3/4 on the regz. B l o g g e r tells me these things. I just don't know who, but  I know you're out there. Can anyone tell me who this woman (above) is? Hint: Her motto is the title of this entry. I kind of would like to encourage people to start commenting on the blog - I'm pretty sure you can do it anonymously. Tell me what you think, or give me ideas on what to write about. I've been doing a lot of late-night recaps, which I will continue to do, but I'd like to due sum uther tings. Ciao.

Hunter S

"He talked about luck and fate and numbers coming up, yet he never ventured a nickel at the casinos because he knew the house had all the percentages. And beneath his pessimism, his bleak conviction that all the machinery was rigged against him, at the bottom of his soul was a faith that he was going to outwit it, that by carefully watching the signs he was going to know when to dodge and be spared. It was fatalism with a loophole, and all you had to do to make it work was never miss a sign. Survival by coordination, as it were. The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but to those who can see it coming and jump aside. Like a frog evading a shillelagh in a midnight marsh." [Rum Diary]

Back to School [Final Countdown Edition]

Back to school yesterday, for the final time, the last semester. However, we need not get reflectional - YET. To usher in the new year, 2010, and catch up with friends, much drinking has been done these past few nights. First night back (Sunday) - 1020 for-four hours or so. Salts McGalts, Robin Hood, EoH, Rufus, Horchata, my cousin, Cherry Island; everyBODY was out.

Das Racist

Rainbow in the Dark

Las Vey Has Wisdom, Part II

Arrive in Vegas around 5pm last Monday. Exciting blends are in the air. In our bags, too. Haaa! JK. Anyway, park da car and call Hunt City to find our where our room in Caesar's is. 6611-6613. It's a big fucking suite. Epic. My favorite part of the suite is this perfectly rounded round table with six chairs (one for each person on the trip), where we can play drinking games or just drink. Fantastic!

Las Vey Has Widsom, Part I

Back from that other coast, just in time to see maaah J-E-T-S beat Cinci for the second straight week to earn a trip to the divisional playoff game @ San Diego next Sunday. HI-YO! Got my wisdom teeth out this morning (all four of them), and this is how it went down: I wake up at 1030 to my dad's gentle voice, who tells me I need to be at the oral surgeon's office an hour later, whooopie! Oh, and can't eat breakfast. <3 Monday's. So I can't feel the bottom half of my face, I'm drugged up as hell, and I see this as a timely opportunity to tell ALL my fans (really just the five people who read this) about California and Vegas.

2010

Happy New Year from LA! 2010-2019 is going to be an awesome time, even better than 2000-2009 (in 2001, I had my Bar Mitzvah and became the shit in the Jewish community; in 2002, I graduated from junior high school; in 2005, I got my license; in 2006, I graduated from high school and enrolled at Columbia; in 2008, I did an onslaught of drugs for the first time [just kidding!]; and in 2009, I fell on a glass table during spring break in Quebec City while I was blackout drunk, and needed eight stitches to mend the blend).